Most people look forward to spending an afternoon in traffic court with the same giddy anticipation that they have at the thought of getting a root canal.

The last thing that you would expect to hear from a courtroom filled with nervous traffic offenders is the sound of hundreds of people joining in a chorus of relaxed laughter. Yet that is exactly what you will find if you attend the extraordinary traffic court of Commissioner Ronald J. Gilbert at West Valley Superior Court in Rancho Cucamonga.

With the court benches filled to capacity, the warm-up act began. The primary bailiff, C. Moore, asked aloud, "Who has been here before?" When better than two dozen hands were raised, he quipped, "See? People love this court so much, they keep coming back!"

While authoritative and expeditious, Moore and the other bailiffs clearly conveyed a mood of light-hearted jocularity.

"This is traffic court, we're not going to treat you like hardened criminals," Moore explained, and then stopped and indicated a particular tough-looking customer in the front row.

"Not even you, my man," he joked as he pounded his fist to his chest and then stuck it out straight in front of him while he asked the smiling tough guy, "Feel the love?"

Then Moore and another bailiff stood in front of a 1 1/2-foot-high stack of bright yellow file folders and started going through them one by one as they began the seemingly interminable roll call of nearly 250 names.

Then, once again they managed to send the courtroom into fits of laughter when Moore called out the name of a final, fictitious defendant - "Lindsay Lohan!"

Moore's previously cheery demeanor seemed to disappear when a latecomer arrived. When Moore pointed out to the tardy offender that his court papers specifically said that no one would be allowed to come in late, everyone gasped in shock when the irreverent man retorted in a decidedly flippant tone, "Well, what am I supposed to do now?"

Moore hesitated for a moment and then turned to a girl in the front row and asked her whether she thought that he should let the latecomer in. When the stunned girl simply nodded her head slowly up and down, Moore said, "So, OK! Come in!"

Moore explained to everyone that Commissioner Gilbert was lenient and fair and that the chances were good that any fines the offenders were facing would be greatly reduced if the commissioner was able to take care of their case in court on this day.

He went on to say that while "he could not tell anyone what to say," if someone pleaded "not guilty," they were going to have to come back and face a trial "upstairs" on another day.

"They are like Nordstrom's up there and it is going to cost you," he explained, "We are like Wal-Mart down here - we're cheap!"

A young woman named Angela who was sitting next to me muttered in awe, "I ain't never been to no court like this before."

Moments later, Commissioner Gilbert entered the room. That is when the real floor show began.

Michelle Groh-Gordy is the owner of InterActive! Traffic School Online at www.trafficinteractive.com , and writes a syndicated weekly column on driving for the publications of the Los Angeles Newspaper Group.