Saying that Maria W. of San Antonio, Texas, had a messy car would have been an enormous understatement.
Lying atop layer upon layer of smashed crumbs from countless food items were innumerable candy wrappers, toys, miscellaneous clothing items, DVDs and sports bottles. Stacked on top of that were various pieces of sporting equipment for her three children.
The final layer consisted of the folding chairs she and her husband needed to observe those sporting events. Her car seats were covered with so many spills and stains that they resembled upholstered Rorschach tests.
Maria W.'s old car was messy enough to win her a new one. Maria entered pictures of her car into a contest on the Web site www.mylifemycarmymess.com .
Sponsored by Chrysler in conjunction with a company called YES Essentials, which produces a line of car products for the "tidiness challenged," Maria's sloppy jalopy earned her family the grand prize of a new Chrysler Pacifica with YES Essentials' "kid, pet and ketchup-proof" seat covers.
Other entries were equally as impressive and/or repulsive, depending on your point of view. In addition to the grand prize, two first-place awards were given out to worthy contenders.
Nicole N. of Worthington, N.J., submitted photos of the interior of a vehicle cramped with four small children, a really big dog, a floor with French fries scattered like pick-up sticks, and a particularly graphic close-up of an immense quantity of frightening, indistinguishable chunks of foreign matter crammed into the jack recess in the vehicle's floor.
The other first-place award was handed out to Angelique W. of Commerce Township, Mo., whose car seats are so stained they appeared to be tie-dyed - a really neat trick, considering they are made of leather. In her essay explaining the condition of the interior, Angelique referred to her own vehicle as a "Dumpster on wheels," composed of "pieces of chicken nuggets, spilled baby formula and the occasional puke from a sick kid."
Honorable mentions went to Daniel B. of Olympia, Wash., who sent in a close-up photo of the floor under the front seat of his car, where a floor mat lay askew so that the black mold-like substance thriving below it could be clearly viewed.
And Molly E. of Lagrange, Ga., wrote that her van was so "rancid" with stains and smells that her 10-year-old gets car sick whenever he rides with her.
Jeanne L. of Alpine, Texas, explained that in the bed of her pickup truck, she has rocks, dead plants, tennis shoes, bottles, cans and "possibly some dead critters." Jeanne superimposed an arrow on her photo, pointing to a magazine in the trash-strewn interior of the truck: Martha Stewart Living.
Clearly, this is one contest in which the best you could hope for would be to never have your vehicle nominated for a prize in the first place.
